The only thing viral should be the way you handle a crisis. The kids are watching.

We’re all in it together. And from social posts by some of my humourous friends… there is a silver lining. No one is travelling, no one is shopping, and no one is talking because of the masks we’re wearing.

This column is not for those struggling with the virus, but those “inconvenienced” by it. Humour aside, parents are beyond panic. And really, it’s time to educate yourself.

Little brother’s school closed before little sister’s. She was horrified. “How come he escapes everything and I have to do summative assessments?” she asked. That night she stayed awake and hopeful—in bed, in the dark, until about 9.30pm—asking periodically if there was a message from school. There wasn’t.

The next morning, she said sadly, “I was so hopeful, but now I’m losing hope.” In what, I asked absent-mindedly. “In school holidays,” she said sadly. I suppressed a genuine laugh. It reminded me of my own school days and the morbid excitement that accompanied the death of a public figure. To a child it only means one thing — holiday!

When middle and high schools closed two days ago, she was so relieved, she cried. The tests were not the issue, little brother having fun without her was. So what did we do? First, we refused to worry. 

As older people talked, and social media messages came, some of her friends, who am I kidding, MOST of her friends were in on every single development: Where the case was detected, What the apartment was called, Which corporate he worked for, Which country had the most cases vs. death… oof! One wonders why parents discuss in front of immature brains that can’t digest this information, let alone discern if it is true. I saw too many worried children this week. And that’s a life lesson they’re learning from adults on how to handle a crisis.

In the week before closure, her Social Studies project was on China – and she was given the topic ‘coronavirus’. While she researched, she acquired the usual information. When I suggested she add stuff about immunity building, she was thrilled – not one of the reports she had read said anything about that. After the slew of natural remedies, I gave her a few from my own Wellness & Wellbeing course – kindness, social connect, and gratitude.

In school, one of the boys had ridiculed her – “Oh, look at this project,” he had mocked, “she says laughing with friends can help you keep well.” Thankfully, my girl is not deterred by unbelievers. She is convinced about the unusual players in the wellness game. 

And that is my parenting tip for today. 

As you stay home, trying to fathom what the next few weeks will be like, OD on ‘Social Connect’ and ‘Kindness’. Start a gratitude journal, work on the things you’ve been avoiding – the clothes cupboard, the diet, the sleep debt, the difficult relationship.

Show kindness even if it isn’t warranted. Buy immunity pills for the people in service who you run into on a daily basis. Chat with the delivery guy. Give him a glass of something refreshing to drink. Watch that family movie, make those calls to your parents, and talk till they get tired of you!

Give your pet her fill of your attention. Overdose on sleep. Have friends over and don’t watch the clock. Bake that cake you’ve been waiting to bake. 

What you shouldn’t do is anything that goes against the spirit of leisure – like reading news that upsets you (it lowers your immunity), hoarding food (opposite of kindness, also bad for your immunity), and trying to find work to hide behind (stress is also bad for immunity).

Relationships develop when there is no agenda. Let yours go viral. 

This column was first published in the Bangalore Mirror on 16 March 2020